Tuesday 18 December 2007

Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?

Posted by speedygeoff on Tuesday, December 18, 2007 with
Tour de Mountain 19k Men
20 Mick Horan 1:40.42
25 Bob Harlow 1:43.46
34 Roger Pilkington 1:49.09
45 Geoff Barker 2:26.49
I cannot believe Geoff Barker took a wrong turn and ran 6 or 7k too far!

Tour de Mountain 19k Women
5 Emma Adams 1:42.58
7 Kelley Flood 1:46.04
10. Charlie McCormack 1:51.14
16. Caroline Campbell 2:16.41

Tour de Mountain 13.6k Women
7. Amanda Walker 1:27.34
8. Rachelle Ellis-Brownlee 1:27.34
I cannot believe Amanda and Rachelle breasted the finish line together and the win was given to Amanda!

You’d Better Watch Out
On the subject of Terry Pratchett (see Sunday's post), "Hogfather" is being shown on TV in Canberra. Part one is this Sunday night, 8:30pm. The novel, Pratchett's 20th, is a brilliant Christmas parody. Let's hope the film version doesn't suck.

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Six geese a laying.

A major outbreak of bird flu occurred with the death of 178 geese in a province of China in late 2004. Migratory geese are blamed for spreading bird flu from China to other parts of the world. Meanwhile in Canberra, concerns have been raised about flocks of geese arriving at the grassy slopes of Parliament House. Authorities deny that there are health issues nor reason for alarm.

However, sources close to Parliament House, reveal that officials from the Department of Health have hidden tape recorders inside statues of lions and placed them at the entrance to the rose garden, hoping to detect the sound of any sniffles or sneezes being made by the group of geese. So far, the only sounds that can be heard on the tape are deep groaning, heavy breathing, and the shrill sound of a loud whistle. There is some debate as to why the whistling occurs every five minutes, and the unlikely suggestion that an extraterrestrial, or “ET”, was responsible was strongly denied.

A request to have the geese destroyed was refused, on the grounds that the request came from, and I quote, “a bunch of tossers”.

ACT Health has released a list of symptoms of bird flu. If you experience these symptoms, please seek medical treatment immediately:
1. High temperature
2. Difficulty breathing
3. Nausea
4. Fatigue
5. Aching in the joints , and
6. An irresistible urge to crap on someone's windshield.

Mr. Rudd is also getting involved in this serious issue. In a press conference at Parliament House today, Kevin Rudd announced an ambitious plan to slow the potential spread of bird flu by making birds obese.“Birds spread the flu by flying,” the Prime Minister told reporters. “So it stands to reason that if birds are too fat to fly, they can’t spread the flu.”The Prime Minister said that he personally developed the strategy for slowing the spread of the deadly flu after realising that “obesity is Australia’s secret weapon in the battle for global health.”

Happy birthday to Roger, 49 yesterday, Katie, 42 today, and Barbara, 59 in six days time. And Merry Christmas to everybody. No "how we trained" today. That's because 27 of us avoided Parliament House and had a Christmas dinner at Banana Leaf (Sri Lankan) restaurant instead. YUMM-O.